I was angry and upset and seriously questioning God at this point. I had really believed that God had led me to Tommy to possibly even marry him one day. Everything just seemed to line up so well when we were together and we seemed to be so similar but I just couldn’t understand why God allowed us to break up. I know now it was only temporary and we just had more growing to do before we were ready to be together.
We were broken up for about two months before I texted him (at around 3 in the morning) one night. I was actually out at a bar with one of my friends and I hadn’t been able to get Tommy out of my head ever since we broke up. How could two people seem so good together and just not work out? Tommy was obviously not up at this hour (obviously) but actually answered me an hour later (I was already asleep) and he thought I needed help with my car or something and I was texting him to ask him for help changing a tire or something haha.
We decided the next day to stay friends and see what happened. I think we actually ended up hanging out again just a few days later. It only took us two weeks to realize that the feelings we had over the summer were still there and we couldn’t just ignore the situation. I was really nervous but really eager to see where this could go. I had always felt like God was there in our relationship when we dated over the summer so I didn’t see any harm in giving it a real shot this time- especially since Tommy only lived 10 minutes down the road now!
So on October 30, 2014 we made it official again and that is why this post is half titled “One Year Anniversary”. Today is our one year anniversary and I wouldn’t change anything about what brought us to this point- even the hard times. It all makes me really appreciate what we have today and makes me realize just how special it is. Tommy still to this day treats me like I am the most special person ever and I have never loved and respected someone so much. Tommy’s the only that I finally “made it” with but even though that is still special to me I realize that that’s not what it’s all about anyway. Doing things God’s way and giving Him the glory in our relationship is what makes it so special, its what causes me to believe that we can make it through anything- because we are following His design and always striving to give Him glory.
Over the past year we have done so many things together- we’ve had so many “firsts” and I wouldn’t trade them for the world. We’ve had our bad times together but the good times ALWAYS far outweigh the bad. My favorite part about our relationship is that we are very committed to doing things God’s way- we mess up daily but always know that He extends grace upon grace to us in those moments. I hope to always be a light of hope and grace in Tommy’s life and I hope he knows that I will always be there to support him in all that he does.
Happy Anniversary Tommy – I couldn’t ask for a more perfect boyfriend<3
I’ve always been one of those girls who wanted a boyfriend- someone I could spend most of my time with and genuinely have a good time with. I always thought it would be an awesome thing to meet my future husband at a young age and end up getting married young and getting to live out my life with my husband. Growing up I’ve had a few boyfriends that I considered to be serious but I never really considered God’s way of having a relationship. I always cared about what He wanted for me but I wanted a boyfriend too much to really seek out and follow His design because I knew it would mean I would have to wait for His timing and let me tell you I was too impatient for that. So I took things into my own hands, thinking I knew better. I always envied those couples in high school and college who made it to their one year anniversary- in my eyes that was when you had “made it” as a couple. I know it’s not true but in my head if someone stayed with you for a whole year that meant that they really loved you and there was a way less chance of them ever leaving. My relationships never made it that long but I always longed for that someone that I could “make it” with and feel as if we were in that serious relationship where I wasn’t afraid of them ever leaving anymore.
After going through a few heartbreaks I finally decided that I didn’t know what I was doing when it came to dating and I really desired to do things God’s way. I was tired of feeling so broken and alone and finally came to terms that God probably knew way better about this whole marriage thing than I did. It took me a while to fully let go of my control in the situation and just allow God to work in my life (a story for another day) but when I did it was more amazing than I could ever imagine and I still am in awe of what God is doing now.
About two years after I came to my breaking point and decided to follow God’s design for dating and marriage, I was introduced to Tommy. I had a friend named Steve (also Tommy’s friend) who knew I was a Christian and had a plan to only date Christians because that was what God had commanded. Before I even knew Tommy, Steve started snap chatting me pictures of Tommy with the caption “your next boyfriend”. I thought it was funny but didn’t think anything of it because well obviously I didn’t know Tommy. Little did I know, Steve must have been joking around with Tommy about this too and actually trying to set us up because Tommy added me on Facebook shortly after the snap chat incident. I still didn’t think anything of it because well Facebook is just Facebook and just because you’re friends with someone on there doesn’t mean you’ll ever talk to them. I actually distinctly remember going through his profile pictures and thinking that he was too good looking for me and that he wasn’t ever going to talk to me anyways (although I did want him to because I knew at this point that he was a Christian 😉 ).
I don’t remember exactly how long after this but Tommy actually ended up texting me! I still remember how excited I was when I found out it was him. 🙂 Apparently Steve had been pushing him more towards me and actually even given Tommy my number- without asking me I might add (good thing Tommy was such a good catch haha). Steve knew we both went to the same church and I guess thought that we would make a good couple.
Tommy and I texted for the next few weeks and I had started to develop a serious crush on him. We just then started learning how similar we are- we’re seriously the same person just different genders, it’s quite strange but seriously awesome at the same time lol. But anyways this was the start to discovering just how similar we really were and I just felt like God had brought him into my life for a reason. We ended up meeting at a Dunkin Donuts- Steve actually tricked me because he was hanging out there with Tommy and a few other friends and invited me to come (actually begged me to). I thought Tommy knew I was coming and that’s why I thought Steve was begging me to (I later found out Tommy had no idea Steve had invited me and had wished me met someone nicer than Dunkin haha). I almost didn’t go because I was soo nervous to meet Tommy but decided to go because my hair was straight and I knew I looked nice that night haha. 😉
Steve actually ended up leaving only about 15 minutes after I got there and I was left with Tommy and a few of their friends- it was insanely nerve raking to say the least. Tommy and I are both shy but talked a little bit and ended up staying for a couple hours after Steve left and he even hugged me goodbye when we left! It’s really cool how perfectly I remember all these little details of our story even almost two years later.
(We actually figured out that this actually was not the first time we met. We grew up in the same town and had gone to the same party a few summers before this night. Tommy remembers me very clearly from that night even down to the details of what I was wearing haha so cool.)
Tommy and I continued to text and hang out after the night we met in Dunkin’ but Tommy was debating on moving to Lake George that summer so wasn’t sure if he really should pursue a relationship with me considering we only had just met. Once he found out that I would be open to the idea of having a long distance relationship he jumped on board and started really pursuing me.
Our first date was on Easter in April of 2014, we went hiking and he held my hand for the first time. 🙂 I was literally on cloud nine and I was so nervous and excited because I knew that this really had the potential to go somewhere. Not long after (maybe a week or two) we were hanging out again and he brought me to my favorite place to drive to (he didn’t know this then) and kissed me for the first time!! 🙂 The beginning of our relationship literally felt like I was living out a movie. I was seriously so nervous but so happy at the same time.
Where we had our first kiss
Tommy actually did end up moving to Lake George in May of 2014 and asked me out the day before he left. Now you might be confused now because half of this post is titled “One Year Anniversary” but hold on we’ll get to that lol. We started dating and Tommy started a new job in Lake George and I visited him a few times across the span of the summer- and he also came home a few times too. Every time I was with him it literally felt so right- like God was really there and that he had led me to Tommy and I was so excited about our future together.
Every time I went up to Lake George that summer Tommy treated me so amazingly. He took me on dates and took care of me so well. I had never had a guy treat me as if I was so special to him. It all made sense why God wanted me to wait for His timing- if I had known it would have worked out so amazingly maybe I would have been more inclined to listen to Him sooner haha but it’s okay, the time I went through before I met Tommy helped me really appreciate everything Tommy did and still does for me now.
That may sound like it’s the end of the story but honestly it’s far from it- I only left you off in about July of 2014. Things didn’t stay so perfect- remember we were still in a long distance relationship (about three hours) and if any of you have been in them you know first hand they are NOT fun at times. Little did we know- Tommy and I had more growing to do before we could have a serious relationship work between the two of us. The long distance really took it’s toll on our relationship during the late summer. We didn’t communicate well at all when we weren’t together and our schedules really didn’t line up especially at the end of the summer and we barely got to see each other. We actually ended up breaking up about a week before Tommy moved back home to New Jersey.
Sorry to leave yah hanging but this is getting a little too long- check back tomorrow to find out how we end up back together! 😉
