• Faith,  Life,  Marriage

    Here’s To Blogging Full-Time + Why I’m Choosing This Path

    It’s official! I am a full-time blogger and stay at home wife. I can’t believe it. That sentence just brings me so much joy. In my last post, I explained how my husband was waiting on some big news from his job regarding a promotion. We heard back about that job and it was not at all what we were led on to believe it was. At first we were very disappointed and confused. We really felt like God was leading us on a new path. But since the job was not what we thought it was going to be, we weren’t sure how this would be possible anymore. There was a lot of confusion, some anger, and some tears, but God showed up big time like he always does. To make a long story short, Tommy is continuing to work with his dad as a welder, and learning as much as he can about his dad’s business in the coming years, to hopefully eventually take over the business down the road. We are so thankful that everything worked out to an even better plan than we originally thought!

    So what that means for me is I get to pursue my dream of blogging full-time! As you can see, there has already been a lot of changes on my blog over the weekend. I ended up switching over to a self-hosting site (which was the biggest headache ever), and was able to customize my blog to finally look the way that I’ve always dreamed of it looking.

    Why I Am Choosing To Be A Stay At Home Wife

    I know that I keep mentioning that I feel like God is leading me to “stay at home” or “work at home”, so I want to explain a little bit more about what that means to me and why I feel like God is calling me to it.

    As a little girl, the one dream that I can remember far outweighing all of the others was being a wife and mom. God answered my long-standing prayer of being a wife on May 22, 2016. It has been a dream since then honestly, but not at all what I thought it would be like. Since then, I’ve written so much about how lost, far from God, and confused I’ve felt. I’ve also written about how much anxiety I have been struggling with since getting married. It honestly didn’t make much sense to me because this is what I’ve always wanted. Why was it so hard?

    It took me a long time and a lot of seeking God for it to finally make sense. God showed me that I was feeling so stressed and lost because I had too much on my plate. Working full-time, at a pretty demanding job no less, didn’t give me much time and much less energy to really get things done at home. I always felt like I was behind on my chores around the house, that I was failing at cooking healthy meals, and that I just was always tired and always on edge. Not exactly how you want to feel during your first year of marriage.

    This was particularly hard on me because my husband and I believe that as a wife or husband, our first priorities should be our family. This just looks differently for both of us. As a wife, that means to me that it is my job to manage my home, meaning cooking healthy meals, cleaning and organizing our home, etc. While we believe it is my husband’s job to provide. So because I felt such a high call to manage the home, I felt like such a failure because I knew I wasn’t doing this to the best of my ability. (Please note, my husband does help me around the house and I really do enjoy working at home. He does not expect these things of me or get angry with me if I am not doing a good job with them. He always lovingly helps me if I am behind.)

    I had no idea how I would ever have the time to do these things well, but when my anxiety got to be so bad, my husband and I felt the only healthy option I had was to quit my job, and seek God as to what to do next. It has been a long, long road but this is why I am choosing to be a stay at home wife and finally feel like I have the time to really manage my home and set the peaceful atmosphere for my husband and guests that I’ve always wanted to.

    What You Can Expect From Me + What Topics I Plan To Write About

    I’ve always, always talked about wanting to post more on here. I honestly have never posted consistently. I plan to have a post up every day, Monday-Friday! As far as topics, I plan to write about my journey to getting a handle on being a stay at home wife – including things like meal planning, my cleaning schedule, and how I budget. I also want to continue on with the healthy eating series I just started. I want to write more extensively about marriage and what I’ve learned so far. I am also going to start sharing wedding details and sharing our pictures, which I’m really excited about! That’s it for the most part, I plan on sharing book reviews when I have them and as always, what God is teaching me. I’m so excited for this new season and am so thankful to be able to share it with you!

     

  • Marriage

    An Update on being a Stay-at-Home Wife

    Life has been vastly different for me since quitting my job three weeks ago. I have so much more freedom than I can ever remember having. It can be a little overwhelming sometimes. Other times it can also be super inspiring. I’m learning to lean on the latter. I have so many plans, both big and small, about what I want to do with my time now. The only thing that’s holding me back is uncertainty right now.

    You see, as I’ve shared before, my husband is in limbo right now and we are waiting to hear back about a job that we were almost certain he was going to get. (Seeing as the owner of the company told him that he wanted him for the job!) There have been a few hiccups though but we should be finding out very soon what is really going to happen.

    I share all that to say that I have been having a hard time finding a “rhythm” as a stay-at-home wife because I am not 100% sure how long I’m going to be able to do this right now. I haven’t wanted to take the time to make a stay at home schedule if it is only a 1-2 month thing, and end up having to go back to work, whether that be part or full time because that would again change my schedule.

    When I first started “working at home”, I also was unsure how I was going to like it. It seemed like an awesome fit before doing it because it gave me a lot more time to focus on the things that are very important to me – cooking healthy foods, cleaning our home, setting a relaxing atmosphere, etc. I was very excited for this because I always felt like I never had enough energy to really devote myself to these things. But I remained skeptical because I was very nervous about what others would think, (and I worried that would affect me so much that I would not be able to stay motivated at home), if I would have too much time to do these things and get bored, how it would affect my marriage, etc.

    Staying Motivated

    All of this has caused me to be confused about how I actually feel about this situation. But I have learned that I definitely could enjoy working from home. I have learned that it is very important to stay motivated as well. For the first few weeks I made a list of things that I wanted to get done around the house while I was at home, but didn’t have the motivation to start them because I felt like I should wait until I found out if I was going to stay home permanently or not first. (Because I wanted to plan out every detail and felt like I couldn’t just yet.)

    While most of my anxiety had gone away after quitting my job, I still had some really bad days and I was really confused as to why. One day I was feeling particularly anxious, while I was thinking about one of these projects that I wanted to get done, and I just decided to just jump right into it. Forget planning. Forget having the “perfect” time to get it done. And I felt so much better for the rest of the day. I was actually amazed at how much better I felt.

    That day I realized how important it is to stay motivated even when you don’t necessarily have to get something done. It’s so important to my well-being to be able to feel like I can accomplish things. I also have been looking more seriously into blogging full-time and I am getting really excited about that.

    What Has Changed Since Being Home

    • I have much less anxiety.
    • I have less stress.
    • I can actually enjoy what I’m doing.
    • I am much happier.
    • I feel more “myself” again.
    • I have more motivation.
    • I pray way more.
    • I have a much better relationship with God.
    • I have clearer skin.

    I attribute all of these great things happening to having more time (obviously). I also believe that these things are a result of listening to what God has planned for you. I believe one reason why we experience a lot of stress and anxiety is because we are trying to live a life that God has not intended for us to live. By taking a step of faith and listening to what God called me to do, I believe it opened up these blessing into my life.

    Projects That I Have Completed/Want To Complete

    I want to also share exactly what I’ve been up to since I’ve been home. Before I quit my job I had projects in the back of my mind that I always wanted to get to but never had the time/energy to do so. Since I’ve been home I have been able to:

    closet-cleanup
    I should have taken a before picture … This is much better than it was!
    • Clean out our bedroom closet (see above picture) – This was the biggest mess you’ve ever seen before I was able to clean it up. I feel so so much better now that it’s done.
    • Catch up on a lot of deep cleaning – I am still working on this but I did 6 loads of laundry yesterday! (3 loads of regular laundry, towels, sheets, and our comforter!) I was also able to dust and really clean the floor in our room (even under the bed!). There are some more deep cleaning projects that I plan to do within the next week too. (Deep cleaning the bathroom, the cars, and the floors in the rest of the house.)
    • Organize our drawers – I have not started this but plan to because these drawers are a mess.
    • Organize the kitchen cabinets/pantry – I want to do this, not because the cabinets are necessarily a mess but because we got a Ninja blender for Christmas and I have nowhere to put it so I haven’t been able to use it! Need to get to this one soon!

    As you can see having more time at home has opened the door to me actually being able to feel like I have a handle on what is going on in our home, rather than me feeling like the house is always one step ahead of me. I feel like I can actually manage the home, which is such a great feeling. Once I get all of these projects done, I plan on making a cleaning schedule and keeping up on all of them. Depending on if I am able to stay home going forward I also plan to make detailed meal plans for each meal of the day and am super excited about that! (I will definitely share more about that going forward!) I hope this answers any questions about what I have been up to the past three weeks! 😉